What Understanding is as a Reader.

 People read because they feel as if either they get information better, or their source of imagination is held by the power of reading. Someone is a reader based on whether or not they read books, let alone know how to read. If someone wants to earn that title, then they must love reading with a passion. A passion for reading isn't predisposed, so it must be learned, hence. A good reader must be savvy with the text; they need to be perceptive and discerning of what they are reading. If one reads with only their eyes, but not the heart and mind, they aren't good readers. Reading is symbolic in many ways, so it takes engagement to read very well. I don't really have a favorite author, even though I've read books before. I don't really have anything for or against their literature. 
   I absolutely do not consider myself a reader. Because of my short attention span, I am unfortunately not a good reader. I am easily bored by the thought of it, and I can't push myself much further than glossing over pages. Reading is not my cup of tea under any circumstances, notwithstanding the Bible. I really don't like reading because I don't see it like others do. People are enthralled by it, and they can binge on several series of books in months. I, however, can't finish a chapter without throwing an internal temper tantrum. The cuticles of my fingers start to burn and itch from the austerity of it. For me, there isn't an objective to reading-- I don't gain very much from it.
   I learned to read through homeschooling; my mom required me to read books since I was four. I'm a very blocked reader at the very, very least. I have no passion for it in any way, shape or form unless it caters to my interests-- which is still very blocked. I'd love to be able to read without my eyelids becoming so sore. I wish I could read a book without any trouble, skimming through it, yet grasping every little detail down to the ink of the letter. I'm never enthusiastic about reading, and I wish I could find my enthusiasm for it.
   The reading I choose to do on my own is limited to the Bible, picture books, a few comic books here and and a few animal encyclopedias there, and only a handful of other categories. I hate non-fiction, sci-fi, mysteries and whatnot. The ideas are so boring and weird, so I don't like bothering them. I got nightmares from certain book covers or other attributes to the books that I rendered creepy.
   I didn't gain anything, really; I knew all of this all along. I've always known how selective and halfhearted my approach to reading is-- period. This process was very upsetting. It's enough that I don't enjoy reading, yet I have to read books I don't like for a grade, and this doesn't help much more. Sharing this makes me feel grouchy and indifferent to how others feel about reading, and I'd like to assure that I am not deliberately trying to downplay something that people love.